I think this is so sad - that people have come to the blogging world looking for an outlet to share and place where they will find support and guidance and maybe even friendship - and they get turned out so to speak. It's particularly tragic that they seem to be outed in a negative way.
On the curtails of that, those who follow me on Twitter may know that after a few glasses of wine too many I became a tad loose lipped and told my best friend that I have a personal finance blog. I think she was fairly surprised - but we didn't get too much into it. Well, last week she asked for the link to my blog.
I was really nervous at first - for me, this blog is a like a diary for my personal-finance related thoughts....and giving the link to a loved one on purpose - wouldn't that be like leaving my diary out in the open?
I thought about that some and came to the conclusion that I think people don't talk about money enough - it's taboo! Wouldn't I be perpetuating this ridiculous taboo by not sharing the link? Didn't I share it with my boyfriend, my mom and my brother (okay - my brother was mostly b/c I needed HTML help when I first started). Of course I should share it with my best friend!
So that's just what I did.
Welcome Best Friend!
~betcha didn't know how hard it was for me to share the link with you - but I'm so glad I did~
I can understand why a lot of people choose not to be public, and you won't see me putting my last name out their anywhere - but I think that I'm at a place where I'm comfortable sharing this blog with a few close people - best friend included. Of course, with it being my choice to share this blog with her, it feels much different then if she had just figured it out. I hope that no one finds me out who has intent to cause hurt and I hope that if that ever happens I have the wherewithal to handle it in a way that lets my writing survive (even if I have to change blog names).
So, how private/public are you with your blog? Have you shared it with family/friends - or are you truly anonymous or public?
I find that as I share more I'm being more private about who I am. Because I talk so much about PF, I get worried about identity theft. So I find myself walking a fine line between giving too much information and none at all.
ReplyDeleteAll my closest friends & family members are aware of my blog. It's up to them to visit the site though. I do express that I'd prefer them not to comment though. As I get to know people in real life (such as FB, Ginger, Webgrrl & Arianne), I begin opening up who I am. But not before that I've found.
Only H & my best friend read my blog. I gave my link to a few other friends, but they don't read it (not interested in PF at all).
ReplyDeleteI have a few close PF bloggers on my Facebook, so they know who I am and vice versa.
But ever since Krystal was outed on her blog - I am so paranoid!!
I think it's great you told your friend though! :)
Hahaha... I believe when I posted my "self outting" post a few months ago (in January was it?) that you said you were struggling with this issue.
ReplyDeleteWelcome to the "dark side" on un-anonymity. At least for me, it doesn't feel that much different.
I'm still anonymous. I think I want to keep it like that for a while. I am from a small town where word travels very fast, and your business is everyone's business so I know once one person knows, the whole town will know my situation. I'm just not that comfortable with everyone knowing it yet. I share my financial situation with some friends verbally, but they don't need to know all the details.
ReplyDeleteThe only people who know who I am IRL are the DC area PF bloggers. And I freaked out after I went to my first happy hour. I felt so naked and exposed! What other bloggers have been outed?
ReplyDeleteI think it's pretty wonderful too! Jessie and I were talking the other day about balance and how between the two of us we'd be the perfect balance, I spend too much and I think she saves too much (and her saving might miss opportunities) (I hope that was okay to say) (I'm nervous about posting a comment, I know you said it was okay to do so, but this is your thing and I don't want to say something wrong)
ReplyDelete;)
I'm enjoying reading your blog and I think I will definately learn some things along the way.
Thank you for trusting me!
I heart you!
PS - what is this about the outing stuff? Some ppl have written blogs and then their names become published and their identities found out? Thats scary.
PPS Also please let me know if I inadverdently blog wrong? lol I just don't know the rules!
Hmm. I totally struggle with this. I've never revealed my name on my blog. BUT, for a few days I inadvertently linked to my real life Twitter page from it. My 20SB profile page uses my real first name. And I've put up face shots a couple of times.
ReplyDeleteIf I was to be outed, I wouldn't really be too fussed.
The one thing I worry about is work - I wouldn't want anyone I know professionally finding out that I blog, sometimes about money. And I try not to write about things that are going on at work.
When I first started out and just wrote about random things in my life, I linked to it from my Facebook page. I eventually took down the link, though. I don't think anyone still follows me from those days, but if they do, they're probably close enough to me that I don't mind.
wow! Awesome feedback, thanks!!
ReplyDelete@ best friend - don't worry, you won't say something wrong. It's totally open :)
You guessed right - there are a few folks who have been made public - not by a choice of their own. Often they close down their blog - sometimes start up again.. it's a tough choice that should be left to each inidividual, not to someone who gets a kick out of figuring out who the anonymous people are... kinda sad i think.
@SS4BC - so far so good :) Hopefully it stays postive.
I am one of the people that had a blog that was "outed" by a co-worker who actually used the information on the blog to get me fired!!! I spoke a little too freely on my frustration with not getting a raise. Well, I've started again - under a pseudonym - and I don't talk about my work, other than my income. So, HOPEFULLY this won't happen again.
ReplyDelete